I first started this blog in the Fall of 2010, when Tristan left home to attend Westminster School. The intention of the blog was to share updates on Tristan as he was at prep school. The blog initially was called Westminster All the Way, but changed to Brotherly Love when my writing started to encompass the activity of all the boys. The name also had to change because Aidan left to go to Cardigan Mountain School and then Williston Northampton School. Over the past seven years I have been on and off writing in the blog, but I think it is time to get going again because there have been some significant changes in our lives.
First, Tristan is no longer the awkward boy that left seven years ago to Westminster School. He is now a Junior at Lehigh University majoring in Psychology and just starting his third year with the Men’s Lacrosse team. Secondly, after spending a year at home working, Aidan is now a freshman at Ithaca College where he is playing on the Men’s Lacrosse team. Aidan is in the Communications School where he is taking writing classes hoping one day to write for movies, shows or video games. He has settled in very well and is even working on campus. And finally, little Dallyn is no longer so little. He has also left the nest and is a Sophomore at Choate School. He worked extremely hard to get into the school and is in the middle of playing football this Fall. He hopes to play hockey in the Winter and lacrosse in the Spring. He has grown up so much over the past year that it amazes me when I look at him.
So Tracey and I have an empty nest at home. It took us 25 years of marriage to get to an empty nest with the full knowledge that they probably will be back again soon to mess up the basement and increase our grocery bill. We do not have to buy two jugs of chocolate milk every three days. The leftovers in the fridge last a little bit longer and the house is very, very quiet. Only when you really think about it does it feel a little lonely in the house.
I spent a lot of time with the boys. No, not just a lot of time, but an incredible amount of time. They all went to the school I worked at so we would drive together to school, I would see them all day and then coach them in the afternoons. And with Dallyn, I spent the most time. He was the one around when the other two were away. There was a lot of one on one time. Some days were awesome and other days were tough. He received a lot of attention and also he would take the heat because the other two were away. Now he is away too. So the drives to school are a lot more quiet then it has been for years.
When you have kids you need to let them take their wings. As much as I want to have them close they need to explore the world and figure out what they want out of life. They may choose to come home and they are always welcome, but I did not have children to dictate to them their course of life. As difficult as it is to watch them stumble I am getting better at letting them hit the bumps. Not saying I don’t have my opinions.
Time sure does not stand still, definitely not for me. I guess I do miss them a bit.